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Before my wife started sleeping with other men, I certainly considered myself a feminist, but I really only understood it in the abstract. When I quit working to Murray personals girls at home with the kids, I began to understand it on a whole new level.

I am an economically dependent househusband coping with the withering drudgery of child-rearing.

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We both know no one ever says it to a woman. The difference is crucial. I provide care.

Hifr bag notwithstanding, I was still a Man. When people ask how it started, I say this: We married young. She never had a boyfriend, never had a lover.

I was the first man she ever had the chance to get to know intimately. By her mids, having already had our children and entering her sexual prime, she felt keenly her lack of sexual experience.

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We opened a bottle of wine and started talking, and talking, and talking. This petty fear has led us as a culture to place judgments on the entire spectrum of female sexual expression: Every option is a trap.

Celibacy is as valid an expression of sexuality as profligacy. She knew how deep our love was, and knew that her wanting a variety of sexual experiences as we traveled through life together would not diminish or disrupt that love.

It took me heir six months — many long, intense conversations, and an ocean of red wine — before I knew it, too.

When I understood that, I finally became a feminist. How does it work? We take turns going out.

Because we have small children ages 6 and 3one of us stays home. Going out alone to hooking up with others was an easy transition. It does work both ways and, yes, I too enjoy sexual carte blanche.

How does it feel? It feels great … mostly. Most of the time, it feels like a mature, responsible way to address our needs and desires within our loving, mutually supportive marriage. It feels very adult, especially because it depends on open, honest communication.

We take great pride in all the talking we do. There are of course moments of jealousy, resentment, and insecurity.

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Fell asleep. The sex is the easy part, the fun part. It happened at the beginning: The first person she dated after we opened up fell hard in love with her, and my wife, overwhelmed by his ardor, tried to love him back.

Watching it happen, I was confused, angry, and terrified that she wanted to leave me. Believing her then was the ultimate trust exercise.

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We survived because eventually I did believe her, and also because I learned to trust myself. Doing so requires supreme self-confidence.

You must first really, truly love yourself; it is the foundation upon which all the other love is built. Already a subscriber? Log in or link your magazine subscription.

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